Youre like Monday: no one likes you. I've Tried, but No One Listens, If I Was Any Better, Vitamins Would Be Taking Me, Better than I Was a Minute Ago, Because You're Here, Okay, Because My Name Wasn't in Today's Obituaries. In a coma, you still have brain function, which doctors can measure by observing electrical activity and your reactions to external stimuli. | Are you surviving? Hey, I can see straight to the back of your head when I look into your eyes! but it's just so blunt and funny. If you've ever worked in an office, used municipal buildings or lived in a city, chances are, you already know what public notices are bland, dull, usually complaining and rarely funny posters that tell us somewhat useful information about all kinds of things. 85. Does the new one work any better? You may have noticed that I take a step back when we talk. He was a good OP, of impeccable character. 382 Likes, 344 Comments. Furthermore, he has teaching experience from Aarhus University. Youre about as sharp as a bowling ball. Without your thumbs, its unlikely you will be able to text anyone. Hemali is an ICF-Certified ACC Level Life Coach with 3 years of experience in relationship, marriage, and grief coaching. . As a result, they were so fixated on thinking about you, they forgot to reply to you. Well, Im hoping its going to get a lot better, I cant lie. 3. 1. Congratulations, sir. Also you texted very late; I would think one of my friends were joking or drunk since it's near Halloween. 28 Witty Responses To Ghosting That'll Haunt Them Forever - Bustle 1. #maudit # peter o'toole # happy birthdayyy # im glad youre still alive. The way youre acting vs reality creates a juxtaposition that highlights their slowness. You'll love these 67+ Sarcastic Instagram Captions for couples, friends I havent met the right one yet. Haha basically a sassy way to say, "I'm still alive." Lets just say if I was a Pokmon, my ability would be Oblivious., Listen, that feeling we call love is just a chemical reaction that compels animals to breed. Oh, what a long list. What do you mean Im still single. HubPages is a registered trademark of The Arena Platform, Inc. Other product and company names shown may be trademarks of their respective owners. Maybe you can Google it. A romantic relationship would severely impair my crime-fighting order of business. No, I'm Finnish. Thank you Fred. Because Id rather be alone than put up with someones sh*t! Hey, whered you get that nose? Why would you talk to someone at their convenience when they wouldnt speak to you when you needed them.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[320,50],'grammarhow_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_2',106,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-grammarhow_com-medrectangle-3-0');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[320,50],'grammarhow_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_3',106,'0','1'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-grammarhow_com-medrectangle-3-0_1');.medrectangle-3-multi-106{border:none!important;display:block!important;float:none!important;line-height:0;margin-bottom:7px!important;margin-left:auto!important;margin-right:auto!important;margin-top:7px!important;max-width:100%!important;min-height:50px;padding:0;text-align:center!important}. For instance, have you hooked up since you've broken up? You should really come with a warning label. Why some QAnon believers think JFK Jr is still alive - and about to 70. My favorites were: "I'd rather have bamboo shoots shoved under my toenails." "I'd rather be in hell with both arms cut off." He was an angry, creative man. 90. Speak Now Or Forever Hold Your Peace: What Does It Mean? How impressive! 42. But it can be funny. 62. 2 I'm Still on the Right Side of the Grass As long as you're still breathing, you can use this reply. It is a humorous way of saying they have not heard from you in a while. Its the same reason why I dont post pictures of myself. Make sure you give witty responses only to persons close to you, or you know they wont get offended by such responses. Be grateful if it happens in that order. David Gerrold (author), Self-decapitation is an extremely difficult, not to say dangerous, thing to attempt. WS Gilbert (dramatist), I bequeath my entire estate to my wife on the condition that she marries again. Wait, are you my Superman/Wonder Woman? bluntz strain indica or sativa; best mobile number tracker with google map in nepal Im jealous of people who dont know you. Martin holds a Masters degree in Finance and International Business. I dont know whether to laugh at you or pity you. Because I prefer the company of dogs/cats rather than humans. Brian OldWolf (author) from Troon on July 30, 2020: Yes, this is a very witty, funny article. Her sessions aim to bring about transformation in her clients lives, perspectives, and relationships. HubPages is a registered trademark of The Arena Platform, Inc. Other product and company names shown may be trademarks of their respective owners. 45. Hemali Adhiya, ICF Certified Relationship Coach, Expertise: Relationships, Marriage, Couples, Grief, Life Coaching, Hemali is an ICF-Certified ACC Level Life Coach with 3 years of experience in relationship, marriage, and grief coaching. You grow on peoplebut then again, so does cancer. Keep calm and be awesome. If they take several days to talk to you again, thats a sign that either they dont want to talk to you, or, they were so dirty that its taken them that song to shower. You could reply with how you are doing and what has been keeping you busy lately. "Any day above ground is a good day. See more ideas about maxine, bones funny, funny quotes. Hopefully, youll stay there. Thats because Im like the last slice of pizza. Checklists & Reminders! I have been going through GOT in my work life. All rights reserved. 6. I hated you the moment I met you, and I still hate you. Alternatively, you can let them know you are doing well but still need time to process your emotions. I see youve chosen this time to humiliate yourself in public. Martin has been featured as an expert in communication and teaching on Forbes and Shopify. (bonus points to you if you sing it). Your response should depend on the rapport you share with the sender. If you knock on my hearts door, I might let you in. I'm alive! 87. Hence, you may need to put in some effort to keep the conversation flowing. Sorry, life. "If at first, you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.". Why not laugh about it and allow it to bring us closer together? funny response to are you still alive - claudiovoiceovers.com 77. 10. The Arena Media Brands, LLC and respective content providers to this website may receive compensation for some links to products and services on this website. Like are you asking because you really wanna hear whats up?. If I wanted to commit suicide, Id climb your ego and jump to your IQ level. Id love to give you a nasty look, but it appears you already have one. What is the most creative reply to, are you still alive? And if they don't reply to this, you can walk the walk away. Im in a loving, committed relationship with my bed. I'm used to it, anyway. 18. #19: Bumble comeback The best comeback text yet. 43. Should I consider that a marriage proposal from you? What if questions can help you form connections fast, but you don't want to rush or force it. At minding my own business? Because youre highly qualified. 24. You'll be asked how you are almost every single day, which is why you should add some humor to your answers. 100 Good Comebacks Best Funny, Witty Comebacks Ever - Parade It's quite the accomplishment. I dont know. I dont think youre an idiot but whats my opinion compared to countless others? Nikhil Saluja, "Immortality . This one is funny when you havent said anything. Financially? If you're stuck in a cycle with your ex of being on and off again, but you know it's not going to work out, don't respond. I love you. 20 Funny Out-of-Office Messages to Inspire Your Own [+ Templates] - HubSpot With a self-assured stance and casual body language, you won't create any . Tell them to stop being nosy and avoid answering. Save the high-quality PDF version on your device now. 51 Funny and Flirty Responses to "How Are You" Texts Do you ever find yourself getting annoyed with yourself because you just thought of an awesomely good comeback to something someone said earlier? Some people are going to find your witty responses funny, and some people arent. This means that when they get super excited, it can cause their heart to beat too fast, which causes death. Is It A Bad Idea To Lose My Virginity To An Old Crush? Passed into the next room and told me to tell you go fuck yourself. Dont wake me up yet. 99 Savage And Funny Answers To "How Old Are You?" In reality, "How are you?" could be more than just a . Financially? Going strong. And trust us, once you use these lines, everyone will be ooh-ing to your snarky comments the next time someone dares to make fun of you! What is the polite way for asking if someone is still alive? 90 Sarcastic Quotes for Witty Comebacks Full of Sarcasm - Quote Ambition Ah, sarcasm. Overwatch 2 Friendly Reminder To Leave a LIKE & SUBSCRIBE, ThanksJoin this channel to get access to perks:https://www.youtube.com/cha. You're the reason God created the middle finger. You dont need to say it. So, ditch the mechanical responses and adopt the witty and fun replies to keep the conversations exciting! Use them as you see fit when someone pokes their nose on your relationship status. Hopefully, not as good as I will ever be. Reproduction without explicit permission is prohibited. Voice command: Alexa, open the pod bay doors. . You look tired. Yep, thats about it just a confusing answer. "Yeah, you're three years late. Patrick Moore (astronomer), "Sometimes I wish my first word was 'quote' so that on my deathbed, my last words could be 'end quote.'" If corporate email language won't do it, nothing will. The person will likely pick up on the joke, making this awkward situation something that can be laughed off. As unlikely as this is, it might be wise to double-check. Its better to be single with high standards than be in a relationship settling for less. Discover what these funny, yet morbid, jokes about burial and death have in common in this hilarious piece about "Alive Jokes". But, if you do say it, it will highlight the problem. *Siri activates front camera*. Take Your Time. All you have to do is save this page, or commit to memory some of our favorite insults from the following list, and youll be all set. 59. Let me introduce you to a man who wrote a comeback so good, he instantly won a date. 53. If this doesnt cause them to reply, then maybe you should rethink your friendship with this person. Instead of listening to your opinion, how about I put on some cartoons for you, and get you a juice box? Finnish with this conversation! 100+ Funny Things to Ask Alexa (with its Hilarious Responses) - ITTVIS It could always have been worse. Maybe because I have a Ph.D. in impatience. How Am I Still Alive. 30. I'm overqualified! I've Been Thinking About You Too They might not be with you right now, but they will always be on your mind. I am doing a bit better than before, but not nearly as awesome as I am going to be. Oftentimes, these people just cant help but stick their noses in things they actually have no business with. Could Be Payday. For some reason, some people think that not texting back is cool. Why dont you tell me, you seem to have a pretty good view from there. If there is just one valid reason for someone not replying to you, that reason would be their death. You enjoy making this girl smile and make her day with your humor. Ever wanted to be the wise-ass who always has a comeback for everything? Photo by Glenna Rankin on reshot 02 "It has been a while since I've heard from you, and at this point, I'm over it." 5 Opening Texts She HAS to Respond To (And Why) 1) "Hey, it's that really charming, irresistible guy from last night" 2) "How's your week looking? I dont know how you do it, but after a shower, you look even greasier. Sort of. I dont follow boys/girls because theyre not my passion. I favour the "How am I what?" Life is up to something. Because you havent put a ring on it yet. Some of the best, wittiest, and most humorous quotations in the English language are quotations about age, childhood, adolescence, middle age, and old age most of all, about growing old! 67. Pick your struggle. Perhaps it will encourage them to respond quicker in the future. 7. 18. 65. 81. Get your own life first before you try sharing it. "Alright. #fyp #basketball #viral #fyp #viralvideo #funny #comedy". Another excuse that people use is Im just hoping in the shower. We cant always get what we want now, can we? "If it looks like I give a damn, please tell me. If you are, then maybe were meant to be! Does anyone ever say anything interesting when you ask them that? While I'd love to give you the technique behind his funny comeback I can't. He may simply be one of the quickest minds in the West. Single is the new blackif that even makes sense! 7. My guardian angel be like 2. 67 Of The Most Hilarious Responses To Public Notices Ever At minding my own business? But, if you do say it, it will highlight the problem. Well, seeing as you care, how long do you have? If I was any better, vitamins would be taking me. In the past, one way to send messages was to attach them to a pigeon. It was also revealed that 40% of users who said they had done the ghosting did so because they simply didnt know how to explain their disinterest and felt that disappearing altogether was less hurtful. Trying to remember the name of that weird person you remind me of. Looks like I overestimated the number of brain cells you have. Whether you're in the jury or on the witness stand or on trial yourself, it's a tense and nail-biting environment. Everyone knows a happy dog wags his tail, so if you're feeling happy and joyful, this would be a good response to give to someone asking how you're doing because it's clever and unique. (Wriggle your hips), Oh, stop it, will you? But, they will grow up into a dog. Physically? 3. 66. Youre supposed to think that theyre so busy being cool that they dont have time for you. (Say it like he or. And it's time for me to make my escape. Then you die. Id hug and kiss you if you were single, just like me. Awwits so cute when you talk about things you dont understand. Perhaps you are just such an exciting person. Id love to insult you, but you probably wouldnt understand. "I am doing good, thank you" is basic, and you can do better than that! 100 Funny and Witty Quotations About Age and Getting Older - Holidappy 17. She buried three husbands and two of them were just napping." [Read: 20 things you MUST know to master a dry sense of humor]. More like give me a sign that. 86. Stand still, so I can hit you with my truck. If this is the person youre talking to, just insure them that you are aware they are not away from their phone. 2 I ask for your birth chart one time, and suddenly, I'm a mind-reading witch that knows what you're thinking. 10. Your question is registered, we will answer when in the mood. You can use variations, such as, "Well enough to chat with you if you wish.". 86 Funny and Flirty Responses To 'How Are You Doing?' - Monk at 25 54 Exciting What If Questions - Best Ways You'll Love Fun - Mantelligence You don't want others to assume that you feel as horrible as you look, so this is the way to set them straight. Oh, a thought crossed your mind? [deleted] 5 yr. ago. When I eat cake, I flip it upside-down just so I can lick the icing off the plate! He started this blog to help others find and define their own self development journey. This way, youre insulting themand they just might be dumb enough not to notice. Socioeconomically? 4. How dare you assume such a thing just a confusing remark. Unknown, "He was a great patriot, a humanitarian, a loyal friend . "I'm alright, mate". Recognize the other person's boundaries, and try not to cross them. 32. Just Smile And Nod [Read: How to learn to be witty and win over everyone in the room]. But if youre getting fed up with always being asked the same questions, you shouldnt feel bad about giving a funny or witty reply. Is that a scar on your face? How much do you charge to deliver an STD? Hello, how are you? There are nosy people everywhere! Alright so far, but there is plenty of time for things to get bad. Physically? 8. I'm wondering how you are. Depends who you ask, if you ask me, it was fine. Nothing that you probably cant figure out if you tried. 14. 39 Heartfelt Poems For Your Mom On Her Birthday, Mom And Daughter Relationship: Everything You Need To Know, 150 Special Ways To Wish Your Long-Distance Girlfriend On Her Birthday, 39 Long-Distance Love Letters To Show Your Love For Him, 51 Good Morning Messages For Her In A Long-Distance Relationship, 24 Beautiful And Touching Poems For People In Long-Distance Relationships, 15 Most Important Things In A Relationship, 61 Great Long-Distance Friendship Quotes And Sayings, 9 Important Qualities Of A Healthy And Happy Relationship. This just in: Bad communication skills are not trending this season! Im quite certain that Im single because I didnt forward those chain messages stating: forward this to 10 people and you will meet the love of your life in 10 days, or else you suffer bad luck in the past. What to say when your crush asks how you are? I bet if you stood on a street corner, youd make some money. My lawyer told me not to answer that question. Still, the ghosters ghost on. 91. Are You Still Alive GIFs | Tenor Her sessions aim to bring about transformation in her clients lives, perspectives, and relationships. 2. 28. [Read: 30 foolproof pickup lines and 10 you should never ever use]. 20 Perfect Responses To Send When Your Ex Texts You - Vixen Daily How do you usually respond to the question? Who knows, maybe you can steer a conversation in a more intriguing path. You nervously reply "yeah, but I'm a little busy and-", only for one person to reply "um, no one asked you. By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. Are those space pants? I had promised myself I would murder the next person who asked me that question. When someone takes a long time to reply, it can feel like an empire could have risen and fallen in that time. I dont have time to accommodate other human beings in my life! 12. What Can Be the Worst Epic Responses To I Love You? - Bonobology.com I do admite that sometimes I hate life, sometimes my hate being in the world! You want to make them laugh, not yell. Could be payday. 35 Best Replies To "I Miss You" (Cute & Friendly) - Grammarhow There are many other euphemisms you could use, though: Still ticking. On this page, I've gathered together 100 of the best. 13. Every civilisation has its genesis and its conclusion. The following responses dont require wit, but do require a funny bone. However, I dont recall anything about morons. What to Say When Someone Calls You Cute? - Beezzly 4. 14. I hope you like some of them. Alive Jokes. This is one of those worst epic responses to I love you makes us feel for the poor love-struck fellow. Im not ready to share my food with anyone yet. Its always annoying when people take a long time to reply. They really care for you, and you better value their presence well. If someone is going to ask you the same old everyday questions, I dont think Im being unreasonable when I say theyre probably just going through the motions and not really interested in your answer. 1. If you're taking a vacation and staying home, your clients or coworkers may still expect you to pop into the office and answer their emails. Watch the video: Only 1 percent of our visitors get these 3 grammar questions right 30 Best Responses To An Apology For A Late Reply. 34 Best Responses To Late Replies (While Texting) The next time the cat gets your tongue, heres a big list of good, witty, nasty, funny sarcastic and clever comebacks for every conversation, no matter where you are! [Read: How to be funny and make someone laugh over text just by being YOU]. "The trouble with quotes about death is that 99.9% of them are made by people who are still alive." Try a Humorous Reply when Someone Asks "How Are You?" - All Women's Talk 80. Chuck Bass? Stellar, great, fantastic but dead inside. Shooting yourself in front of the person who asked. Like for your friends and close ones, here are some witty responses and replies to make them laugh, because they know exactly how you're doing and ask you as par of formality. I am not looking for anyone, and neither is anyone looking for me. Im a wreck of a human being, thats why! funny response to are you still alive 09 June 2022. no disease, including cancer, can exist in an alkaline environment / siberian husky mask types Great, but I should warn you that I am totally biased. Try these OOO messages to let people know you're taking a break. Here's the good news: I've collected plenty of answer options for you to make that unbearably awkward question a little more bearable. Could Be Better. If your best friends are worrying about you due to your new break up, this one you can use to make them feel relaxed. "Ugh I was so lazy this week. It takes a specific kind of person to ghost someone its really not that hard to send a quick Im not interested text but rest assured, they exist.
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